Medieval & Fantasy Minecraft Roleplaying

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jake1248's application form. [Declined-Abbeyvie]

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jake1248

I think I might like it here
1. What is your minecraft username?
jake1248
2. How old are you?
14 years old
3. What gender are you?
male
4. What country do you live in?
U.A.E, Dubai
5a. Do you agree to read our Survival Guide before logging onto the server?
yes i agree
5b. Do you agree to consult both our Tome of Citizenship and Everything you need to know page before asking any questions in the game?
yes i agree again
6. Please provide a lengthy in-character introduction.
Jake was a guy who used to live an ordinary village life.He was a blacksmith.His family was really poor.Jake was too poor so he couldnt go to school.He used to earn money by selling hammers,swords and tools.He did not have much friends because he was poor.He thought that no one liked him.His life was really boring and sad.Everyone in his village used to treat him really bad.One day due to some problems his brother ran away from his homeland.So he thought that he would run away and try to save his brother.So he crafted his bestsword and ventured out of the village to search for his brother.He believed that his brother would be in this land.On the way he had defeat all the monsters that came in his way and he had to face many challenges. He makes alot of friends on the way .So he hopes that he would find his brother one day and return home.After along time he finds out that his brother was killed.Evil was flowing through his blood.He wants to find his brothers killer and avenge him.After killing his killer he wants power.He believes that there is a stone that gives him magical powers .So his last mission was to find that stone.One day he finally got the stone!On his way back he saw a pack of wolves led by a man .That man attacked him because he knew that he had the stone.His pack of wolves pounced on jake.He used the magical stone and burnt all the wolves.Then the man ran away.Jake was angry as he attacked him.Jake chased the man and killed him.Realising that he had so much power,jake made an army and tried to destroy his village for being rude to him.From that day onwards everyone used to call him the king of chaos.


7. Please introduce yourself to the community; hello my name is jake1248.My real name is jacob and i live in Dubai.I am 14 years old(my birthday is on july 30).I study in 9th standard at OOHS al warqaa. i like to play soccer and minecraft and sometimes cricket. i like minecraft and i heard that this server is a very good server.My hobbies are singing and painting.i have no pets as i am living in a flat..i have to siblings.my brothers name is mathew and my sisters name is ann.Both of them are younger than me.My brother is evil because he always tries to blackmail me but he is really funny.My sister is the most irritating sister in the world but i still love her.I love playing on my ps3 and my second favourite game is bf3. If i get chosen in hollowcraft i would like to post a video about it.in your community i will be kind and listen to all the rules.i hope that you guys will choose me!
8. Do you have any examples of your work and creativity, either in minecraft or outside? You can attach them to this post using the "upload a file" button or link to the image or video. not now but once i join hollowcraft i plan to make an arena

9. Is there anything else you wish to share with us?
nothing else.
10. Are you aware that the use of black magic (xray,xray texture packs and ore locator mods) is not allowed on our server, and a banishable offense?
yes i am aware
11. How did you find out about our server?
i wrote best minecraft premium servers and i found this server.
12. Have you voted for us?
nope but if i get applied for whitelist im sure i will vote!
 

matyio

The original mute
Need to increase the length of the answers to six and seven, and don't forget question twelve.
 

bounty1663

Villager
1. Add more too question six
2. Try and come up with a RP name
3. Like matyio said, dont forget question twelve
Other then that I liked it.
 

matyio

The original mute
You have forgotten to increase the length of question 6 and 7. 6 needs to introduce your characters frame of mind, who they are, and what they believe. You don't have to say their name though. 7 the only problem is the sentences are two or three words, so what about your siblings? Are they nice, fun, evil, anything like that? You dont have to add more sentences but add more detail.
 

jake1248

I think I might like it here
You have not, or you have and not updated the post. Either way this could be taken as lying and mean you get insta declined for it, fix them and you have a chance.
ok i did it !!!!!!tnx for the advice.hope you like it!
 

matyio

The original mute
While 7 is better, the story is too modern. We are a medieval server, not one of modern rp. Your story, needs to be changed, though you have the right end of the stick with the way you are writing.
 

matyio

The original mute
the backstory is not detailed enough, its just, i did this, then this, thn this, not i did this, while thinking, this about this. thats a good start you have there but make it better by adding thoughts in.
 

jake1248

I think I might like it here
the backstory is not detailed enough, its just, i did this, then this, thn this, not i did this, while thinking, this about this. thats a good start you have there but make it better by adding thoughts in.
ok i finished.this is all i can do!
 

matyio

The original mute
A bit op maybe make it so the quest for the stone brought him here. Other than that great. I have to ask, not to insult, but do you have an English spell and grammar checker? Might be useful for stories, but not for rp.
 

matyio

The original mute
Not what I meant sorry, I was just asking if you had something on your computer that you could go spelling and grammar check and get it all done.
 
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